A New Understanding.. and Progress Despite the Pain

Over the past couple of days I've been given the tiniest glimmer of an insight into the lives of many whose blogs I read.  The many who suffer chronic pain. I have always respected their tenacity and ability to hold onto the joy in life, and to do things! despite and through their pain.  I am now in awe.

My wrist flared up so badly that even 30 seconds with the mouse caused Pain (yes, that capital "P" is intentional).  Typing on the ergonomic keyboard was uncomfortable, but did not increase the pain level.... typing on the laptops "straight" keyboard did increase the pain level. (I should learn from this, neh?)  The mouse thing meant that I couldn't even read blogs, much less write my own.  This "fun", with which I am familiar, was combined with a new bizarre shoulder-blade area pain that I've never felt before.  By the end of day two with that, I was envisioning all sorts of medical conditions involving my lungs since I could not come up with any explanation for the muscular distress I appeared to be feeling.  Yesterday morning, even sitting up hurt. I still don't know what it was/is, but it's easing a bit.

I was finding myself depressed by this after only a few days.  To those of you who live with chronic pain all the time..... I salute you, I have no idea how you do the things you do!  And so many of you do it without complaining.  I feel rather like a whiner even mentioning my four day problems on the web --- but they do allow me to explain my lack of progress...

You see, typing and mousing weren't the only activities affected.  Knitting on any needles smaller than a 4 was not an option (progress on Sock de Mer and DH's Harlequin socks came to a screeching halt; ditto Rivendell).  Even 8's allowed for only short spates.  My addiction is such, however, that I have yet to manage 24 hours without any knitting at all.   

Yesterday, for example, my devotion to the Divine Though Blogless Elizabeth and our Irtfa'a project trumped the sensible part of me that said "do not knit at all today".  Last night, after her incredibly Geek-Studly husband resolved a wee computer issue (in which only one printer could print despite the printer being on a print server purchased expressly so that all could print), I sat with her and we knit one row on Irtfa'a.  I'm not sure I could have done that had it not been a beaded row, which involved lots of letting go of needles to exchange them for the crochet hook.

What is a girl to do?  How was I to make progress on any front?

I chose progress on the Mission Possible front.  I took a good long look at this:

This is the back (or front) of a sweater that, in 1995, my DH and I thought would be a good idea.  That pale blue is really a bit more electric royal than slightly turquoise, and the dark blue is darker.  The burgundy is about right, but the red is not quite bright enough.  This, my friends, is my personal introduction to intarsia.  It is a sweater that DH said he wanted.

As sweaters go, I think it is now so dated that finishing it might allow DH to be a fashion leader in the calling back of 80's fashion rather than just a person in several season's old clothing.  Alas, DH is not a fashion leader.  Nor, as far as I know, has he ever really been a bright colors kind of guy.  And frankly, the 80's fashions are not the ones to which I'd like to see us return. I've no idea why we thought this would be a good idea.  Finishing this would do nothing more than place one more never-to-be-worn sweater in his closet.

That said, I'm rather proud of this.  I think that, especially considering it was my first real intarsia experience, the knitting is pretty good.  I see no holes between colors... and even in its unblocked state, the fabric is pretty smooth and even.  I am pleased with the technique's expression as it were.

None-the-less, by the time dinner hit the table last night, this garment's top edge looked like this:

There you see the tell-tale kinkiness of frogged yarn.  Frogging intarsia is a pita.  But frogging is what's happening here.  This sweater will never be worn by any member of my family.  And while Mission Possible's rules DO include donations, the donations are only of projects that you do not resolve during the term of the project.  I am not going to finish this only to pop it in the Donation Bag.  I am going to return as much of it as is reasonable to usable yarn status (thereby resolving it, according to the rules), and put that yarn (and the rest of the balls) up on Ravelry and KnitSwap for trade/sell.

I'm hoping that today my wrist will allow me a bit more knitting time.  But I'll try to find other important things to do instead to give my wrist as much of a break as I can.  For example... today we go to Lowe's to see if replacing the lawn mower's charging cord is possible.  If not... I guess I'll have to investigate new mowers.  :-( 

Comments

[Maria]

I think I have a very similar sweater that I started for my hubby. We should have planned a frogging party! I might have to dust of the container it's in and blog it.

I can sympathize with you on the wrist pain. Mine is better now, but for a while, I couldn't even lift my Diet Coke can. Not knitting made me want to panic. A chiropractor helped mine a lot.

[Sylvia]

H, pain is inanimate and simply something a person faces, along with gravity. Wishing you patience and healing...

[Nora]

Take it easy on the wrists, OK? Better to take a few days off than have to take a longer time out.

What sort of yarn is the froggage? It does indeed look like a Very 80's Sweater - and you did a nice job on it! You can take comfort in that...

Have a good weekend.

[jessie]

Ouch. No knitting, no typing, no reason for living, right? That has to stink. I hope you can manage to rest your wrist enough to let it heal and then figure out what not to do in the future (other than not knit and not type). Heal fast!

[Helen]

Thanks for the recognition: I'm not in pain but I'm ill all the time and most days I'm too weak to walk to the end of the street. I thought at the beginning that I would blog about it but I've discovered that I prefer not to, and to write about what I can do, not what I can't - I hadn't previously realized that I was a Pollyana :) But don't feel too bad; get well and I hope you can take things for granted soon. And rest really will make a difference and you will get better faster if you do it.

[kmkat]

What does it say about me that I love the Mission Impossible sweater? I do see how it is dated, but I love it, nonetheless.

[janna]

Well.... that's, um, quite a sweater! It looks like something Bill Cosby might have worn on his show back in the 80s! What's frogging do to the wrist pain?