Knitting humor, and the WIPs are winning

A friend shared this with me.

I MUST share it with you.

I've ganked it, rudely, from HERE

 

Perhaps that will make up for the lameness of what follows.

I'm progressing nowhere very quickly.

I have managed to divide Kitty's Wolf Hoodie for the armholes (but have no pictures -- someone *cough* Bookworm *cough* borrowed my camera, had lots of fun, and ran the battery down to ... well... nothing).  I had to do it twice, because the first time, I managed to create what would have been an interesting, asymmetrical zippered hoodie.  While asymmetrical might be cool and stylish, it wasn't sufficiently asymmetrical for anyone to believe it was intentional.

And those glorious mitts... Well.. um, they're stalled.

I did figure out what the cuff needs to look like. And now I'm flummoxed altogether in my attempts to coerce the yarn to do what I want it to do. 

It's clear that I need to keep a nice visual zig zag thing going, but… I need to get some stretchy in there too.  No one wants flappy wrists. But. Color work zig zag kind of undoes stretchy.

I tried getting the zig zag the same way one does in Jaywalker socks, while sneaking in some rib action but, since my zig zags are only 5 stitches between points (at 5.75 st/in) that means I’m working the following:

color A: (cdd, k1, inc 1, p1, inc 1) repeat.
color A: p1, k2, p1, k2
color A: cddp, k1, inc1, p1, inc1
Color B: k around
Color B: cddp, k1, inc1, p1, inc1
Color B:p1, k2, p1, k2
Color A….

Fussy, hard to see in the black rows, and in the end, it has almost no zig zag, and, frankly, isn’t very stretchy.

Horizontal stripiness looks like crap. Vertical stripes look worse. HOW to I keep the zigzag (or even some other color miracle) while getting stretchy/snuggy for the cuff?

Ordinarily, I'd be perfectly content with dithering about on this for months until I achieved success.  But this time, I want the gift to be on the hands of the donee, not in the time-out corner for miscreant WIPs.  This WIP is whippin' my butt, and I don't like it.

Whine mode off.

Today is Golf Pro's birthday, and I'm going back to celebrating that. 

Comments

[Colleen G]

Here's a thunk. What if you did color work every other row, and only on the knit portion of a k1p1 rib. Then you'd have essentially a chain of color going down the ribs. (You could alternate rows too, round one color A for the knits and B for the perls, round two color B for the knits and A for the perls.
Just a thunk. It'd only take like 4 rounds to see if you liked it.

[D]

Happy Birthday to the Golf Pro!