Every now and then, as people go about their lives, silly mistakes happen.
All too often silly mistakes lead to frustration, and that leads to anger. What happens next depends a lot on personalities, but it also depends on the choices we make about how we will respond. A lot also depends on how well we understand the other people involved in the situation -- and how they respond to frustration and anger.
When we're dealing with other people in frustrating situations, one of the hardest things to do is slow down, pause, and remember what forms of communication work best with those people, and which ones seem to fail every time. However, if we can pause, think, assess, and THEN respond, we're more likely to be able to diffuse a frustrating situation.
I'm not there yet. I still react a little too quickly, and thus wind up exacerbating a touchy situation. I still listen to the little voice in my head that says, for example, that if the person on the other end of the phone has disconnected before I was finished gathering information, I need to reconnect immediately. Alas, this may mean I call back during the time when the other person needs a minute to calm down. This creates frustration and anger on both sides.
What happens NEXT depends on how we process anger, and how quickly we can let go of it. When we hold onto anger or frustration we extend the period of frustration, and hurt that we experience. We also find ourselves either blaming others -- and increasing our frustration and anger with the others, or blaming ourselves for everything -- in increasing our frustration and anger and hurt.
When we let go of the anger, forgive ourselves and the others involved, we reduce the amount of time we spend feeling bad. We also open the possibility for improving our relationships with the folks with whom we were frustrated and angry. We make more room for love, for happiness, for joy, for laughter.
One thing I've noticed lately is that the more I take care of myself, the more I do my Five Rites, and take time to do a little meditation each day .... the faster I recover from anger. I'm better able to let go of the things that frustrated me, and I'm better able to let go of the hurt I feel when others are angry with me. The result is that I'm ready to move on from a frustrating experience much more quickly. With luck, I'll work my way backwards up this process, and find myself able to avoid the anger and frustration more often.
I consider this to be a win.